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The current period represents a full decade since the phrase “ghosting” hit the public consciousness. Initially, the idea that someone could instantly end all contact with a lover without a word seemed like the height of rudeness. How naive we were. In the decade since, navigating toward a partner has only become more perplexing – an frequently fruitless endeavor in awkwardness that is increasingly pigeonholed by social media lingo.

Generation Z, a cohort who grew up during a loneliness epidemic, a male identity crisis, and a concerted assault on the rights of females and the queer community, faces a infinitely more complex environment than their Gen Y elders could ever fathom. And so their romantic vocabulary has grown longer and more bizarre, with phrases like “Ogre-ing” and “monkey branching” straining the limits of your sanity.

Below is a extensive guide to the terms Zoomers is using to navigate love, intimacy and the pursuit of both. To paraphrase one of the year’s most popular memes, by the end of this list you’ll long to get back to God’s country – because wherever that is, it doesn’t have “wokefishing”.

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The Letter A

Genuineness – In the view of gen Z, romance's ideal is presenting as your true, raw self. Best wishes with that!

The Letter B

Avian theory – A online phenomenon inspired by a test developed by relationship scientists, in which you bring up something minor – for example, “A bird flew by earlier” – and observe whether your partner’s reply is engaged or brushed off. If they show no desire to hear more about the bird, you two are doomed.

Black cat girlfriend – Gen Z’s response to the “quirky fantasy girl” archetype of the early 2000s – but rather than having short fringe, liking indie music and eschewing commitment, the mysterious partner prioritizes herself while radiating mystery and independence. (She might still have that fringe.)

C

Support test – This signifies choosing someone who aids you proactively. If you walked into a room, they would fetch a seat for you to take a load off.

Choremance – A meet-up where two people form a link while running errands, such as pet care or grocery shopping. In other words, how broke twentysomethings do affordable dating in a post-cheap-date world.

Emotional spiral – Melting down when you feel burdened by life. You can spiral over a infatuation or split, spilling all of your (unrequited) feelings.

The Letter D

DINK – Double income, no kids. Once a marker of 80s young urban professional excess, it refers to partners who opt out of having children to focus on their own fulfillment. Or because they find it financially impossible to become parents.

The Letter E

Open communication – The opposite of playing it cool: embracing dialogue, transparency and vulnerability.

F

Indicators

• Warning signs – Personal habits suggesting a prospective partner is not right. Examples include calling their former partners unstable, poor tipping habits, a fondness for Woody Allen films, a nascent DJ career …
• Positive signs – These quirks confirm your choice to pursue a mate. Such as following up to make sure you got home safely after a date, minimal screen time, owning a bed frame …
• Neutral quirks – These typically describe specific, mostly inoffensive idiosyncrasies. Examples include being an enthusiastic birdwatcher, still carrying around a pen in their purse, paying rent in cash …

Freak matching – When you connect with someone who’s just as enthusiastic about films about the second world war or DVD collecting or art or anything it may be, as you. Or, on the flip side, meeting someone who despises the same stuff or people that you do (nothing fosters intimacy faster than having a nemesis).

G

The band Geese – A band a typical Zoomer guy likes.

Phantom reappearing – Someone who pops back into your life after a period of ghosting.

Loyal boyfriend – Someone who is friendly, eager to please and loyal. The uncommon partner who is beloved by all of his partner’s friends, and a black cat girlfriend's opposite.

Gooners – A mostly online subculture of men so obsessed with self-pleasure that they attempt lengthy sessions, deliberately postponing climax so they can persist as long as possible.

The Letter H

Gloomy heterosexuality – A trend describing many women’s increasing despair toward heterosexual relationships. It will come as little surprise to anyone who read the above entry.

Traditional ideal woman – An stereotype touted by online male influencer figures: a woman who is sexually desirable, ever-comforting and contentedly domestic, who seemingly has no goals of her own aside from satisfying her male partner. Maybe now you’re beginning to see the whole “pessimism” thing better?

I

Icks – Arbitrary and usually everyday dealbreakers that instantly shut down any feelings of interest.

“Actions speak louder" – Something to remember after you watch someone else receive an incredibly romantic gesture.

The Letter J

Professions – These have not been this significant in the romance landscape since the greed-is-good era. For some women, a “finance bro” is the ultimate catch: a fleece-vest-wearing, conservative-leaning guy who will provide (there’s a popular TikTok audio on the topic). Meanwhile the anti-capitalist crowd prefer partners in sectors they believe are being staffed by the more nurturing among us: healthcare workers, teachers or counselors.

K

Locking lips – This year, scientists learned that the kiss has been around for 16m years. But the era of locking lips may be numbered since some Zoomers desire fewer sex scenes in movies, as they are having reduced intimacy themselves and do not find cinematic romance authentic.

Kittenfishing – Slight exaggeration. Or, not exactly lying about who you are, but maybe using outdated (better) photos of yourself on a online profile, or making your career sound more impressive than it is. Also known as {